East Side Public Library

East Side Public Library
The Ruins of Detroit

Thursday, May 26, 2011

A Life Changing Event

It had been in November, I was at my godmother’s wedding. It was right after taking pictures of the happy bride and groom when I checked my phone and my life changed forever. They had been my friends, my three best friends whom I had just planned a trip to Florida with without them knowing literally five minutes before they betrayed me. They had rejected my friendship, out of the blue, out of nowhere, without explanation, in a span of a few text messages. Really? Text Messages? We were juniors in high school and they didn’t have the audacity to confront me in person, they had to hide behind technology as they tore me down. “You’re not worth our friendship anymore” among with other very mean and inappropriate things were sent to me, by all three of them, all at the same time. Apparently I was a fun topic to talk about at sleepovers.
            So, there I was, at the wedding reception, bawling my eyes out just wanting some answers but, I guess I’m unworthy of that right. I’ll never know why they did it or what drove them to do it. No one really does but the next day at school was awful. They had tried their hardest to get people to hate me by telling them lies, telling them all of the fights we had. Eleven years of friendship meant jack in the end and they used everything against me to try to scrounge up enemies. This really forced me to reevaluate how I am as a friend and who really was a friend in the end. The result of this little “hate club” was devastating but necessary.
            With a void in my life it was pretty hard to even function. I was left broken with a boyfriend who became my support overnight. This automatic dependency on a boy I had been dating for only two months took a toll on our relationship. I was blind to how poor he had been treating me due to how much I needed him for a bit while I tried to regain my dignity. This event ruined a good portion of my junior year of high school because no matter what, those three would run their mouths and continue to give me reasons to loath every fiber of their being. It was impossible to come to school sometimes when I had so much anger built up so at one point I knew I was going to snap, sending fists of fury into their faces but I controlled it and thought to myself “that lack of social skills will hold them back as I move forward.”
            I had to be strong, I had to have a chin up and I learned how to just accept things and believe that life moves on. I had to embrace the concept that being nice to people who may not entirely deserves it is really good for the soul. Being nice because it feels nice is false, but being nice because it’s a yearning that needs to be fulfilled is true and that is what those three made me follow. Due to them I am more independent and nicer overall. Despite how much they influenced a terrible relationship I was in it really helped me develop as a person.
            A year and a half later it is clear to me that those three really needed to do that. I am better than that, I will move on and I strive to be the best I can be. My new friends don’t ridicule about my interests or scoff at my habits, my old but new friends have been through it all and will pick me up when I am down which is something I am not accustomed to. So really, at this point, I would like to thank those three that put me down for no reason in a text message. They showed me how much better I am than I thought I was. Now I can put one foot in front of the other and get moving to a life that I am independent in.

1 comment:

  1. Maricruz SanchezMay 26, 2011 at 12:45 PM

    One thing that astonishes me is how similar we are, no not even that, the same situation we have been in. The same outcome - being grateful and INDEPENDENT. When we stop relying on others we are not let down. That does not void help from others, just strengthens our own ability to recover and take things with "the bigger picture" in mind. Their lack of communication is really just a form of immaturity. Just like we read that article with the dwindling numbers of mature human beings on Wednesday, it is far and few that are actually interesting while being mature. Thank you for being there for me while this similar occasion has occurred in my life. With you sharing this blog I do not feel alone and those people were never friends, they were only using that label to get further in their own life by superficial means. When it came down to it, they are only self absorbed.